Talk:Remnant Timeline/@comment-4010415-20161130223447
Made too many adjustments to the page to fit in the edit summary, so here's my edit summary: * Adjusted wording because it made it sound like the Brotherhood is all about the Maidens and that what they're protecting the people of the world from is specifically people who would steal the Maidens' powers. I'm pretty sure the Brotherhood was originally about protecting mankind, in general, from things like Salem, and the Maidens bit was tacked on after Monty came up with the Maidens. * Added the word "The" so these sentences about the Faunus Rights Revolution and the Battle of Fort Castle wouldn't be incomplete sentences. * The wording on the White Fang's founding was a bit inaccurate and makes it sound like they immediately started protesting after winning the war for whatever reason. Changed it to say they were founded as a symbol of peace and unity and later became a protest organization due to continued discrimination. * Added "Shortly after the birth of Yang," to add a timeframe to Raven cutting ties with STRQ. * Yang was looking for clues to her mother's whereabouts, not specifically for her mother's whereabouts. * Changed "behaviour" to "behavior" in accordance with American spelling. * Added that the Giant Armor fight was a test for Weiss to earn Jacques' permission to attend Beacon. It's just a few words, and I thought it'd be nice to clarify what that was about. * Added that the Black Trailer's events take place the morning after Cinder failed to recruit the White Fang, to add a timeframe for it. Adam had said that the train would be there at dawn. * Added that Yang was looking for info about Raven in the Yellow Trailer. Again, just a few words and it'd be nice to clarify. * Added that the day Tukson was killed was just before Beacon's second semester began, considering Ruby said it was the last day of their vacation and went on to say their second semester will be great. * Added that some of Beacon's staff also helped fight the Grimm in Breach. * "Takes them back to" makes Merlot's Island not fit in the list with the locations they revisited. * Isn't an android a robot that looks like a person like Penny? Either way, it wasn't just the Atlesian Knights, it was also the mech suits, so it's still inaccurate. Changed to robots in the part about Roman reprogramming Atlesian bots to attack civilians. * The Character Short does not take place 6-8 months after volume 3. The start of volume 4 does. They said the Character Short takes place just outside Vale, so RNJR was still on Sanus at the time. They also said it takes place between volumes 3 and 4. * The second sentence in the Salem's faction meeting was incomplete. * Added that the bandits that attacked Shion were Raven's bandit tribe. * Added Yang resolving to put on her arm, since that's a major step in her story, I guess.